Are you a good listener?
Techniques of Good Listening
To be an effective communicator depends on your clarity,speech style, and the tone of voice you use and how the listener hears the message.
Appreciative– someone who is listening for enjoyment—watching a show, movie, or listening to music
Empathetic–someone who listens to provide you feedback—critiquing a speech
Comprehensive—someone who listens and compares the information you’re giving with the information they already know.
Evaluative—people who want to hear facts from the speaker. They want to know you intention in giving out the information
How The Speaker Knows the Listener is Hearing What They’re Saying
The speaker wants to know that the listener is hearing what they’re sayingt:
1. You can convey that you’re listening through body language, just by the way you hold your head.
2. When you talk to the speaker you can paraphase what they just said to let them know that you heard what they said.
3. Listen with your whole self–maintain eye contact and lean toward them
4. Smile–this puts the speaker at ease
5. Ask questions—this lets the speaker know you hear what they’re saying
Improve Your Listening Skills
Keep an open mind—listen without being judgemental
Visualize what the speaker is saying—create a picture in your head, especially when the speaker is using discriptive words
Don’t interrupt or give your opinion–Interrupting sends a variety of messages. It says:
- “I’m more important than you are.”
- “What I have to say is more interesting, accurate or relevant.”
- “I don’t really care what you think.”
- “I don’t have time for your opinion.”
- “This isn’t a conversation, it’s a contest, and I’m going to win.”
Wait for speaker to stop Talking—then ask questions to clarify understanding
Feel what the speaker is feeling–show empathy to the stories that the speaker is saying
Give regular feedback—shows that you understand where they’re coming from